Why I Stopped Telling my Friends I Loved Them

Thursday, November 13, 2014

It all changed over 3 years ago... I used to end every phone call with "love you bye" then click. I ended up overusing the phase to a point where it had no meaning. Did I care? No. We all did it. (We meaning my friends) Then that one fateful day, I was at work, probably 4 months into my internship. I was at the point where I was feeling really comfortable with the company. I had made friends to eat lunch with, people would come by my cube to chat and laugh. People loved me; I was the young vibrant co-worker who's youthful insight was found to be hilarious. I was loving it.

Then one day, I was on the phone with my Project Executive. He was answering some work question when I made a little joke as we were wrapping up the conversation. He laughed. I laughed. He made some joke and ended his sentence with a rapid "oh... I gotta go". I, still chuckling, said "Oh! Okay! Love you bye" and I hung up. Probably 15 seconds passed by when I realized what I had just done. Mortified, I stood up with my phone in my hand and was frozen. "Do I call him back?", "Do I pretend it didn't happen?". I decided the best thing was to call and explain, to avoid the awkward encounter. So I did. He didn't answer. The anxiety started to build up in my chest. I was frantic. "Oh God," I thought, "What if they fire me?!" (You already know I am a worst case scenario person, so yes, I went there).

For what felt like an hour, but was actually 5 minutes, I finally got the phone call back from my boss. "Hi" I said
"Yes?" He said inquisitively
"Uh. I. Oh.... mumble mumble mumble." I stuttered like an idiot.
He began to chuckle, "It's okay, my daughters do that all the time."
Can you feel my sigh of relief?!

So that was the last time I ever ended a conversation with "Love you, bye."



101 things in 1001 days

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

Last Updated: 1/5/14

I've been compiling this list for a few weeks now and have finally mustered up the courage to finish and post.

I've seen various bloggers compile their lists, and felt like I should do the same. I have 1,001 days  to complete 101 (102 I can't find one to delete!) tasks or goals, basically a short term bucket list. One of the reasons why I had such a hard time posting this is because unlike my other posts, I feel like my dreams and goals are more intimate than my ramblings and experiences. I have broken this list down into categories to make my accomplishments much easier to track and frankly, to follow through!

So here we go...
Starts: November 11th, 2014
Ends: August 8th, 2017

PERSONAL (0/30)
Go two weeks without eating out.
Educate myself on the art of making and tasting wine
See 4 concerts (I'll be seeing the Grateful Dead in June!)
Go to the movies alone
Go to dinner alone (This is freaking scary)
Unplug for 24 hours (TV, phone, computer)
Invest in reliable luggage
Beat my 1/2 Marathon PR Time (Currently it's 2:50:54)
Lose and keep off 10 pounds
Drink 80 oz of water a day for 1 Month!12/18/14
Try three new foods... and blog about them
Finish the Whole 30 Challenge
Pay off my Student Loans!!!
Watch the sun rise in NY, watch the sun set in CA
Create a signature dish/meal
Make my apartment my dream apartment (decor wise)
Update my signature scent (old is Magnetism by Escada)
Put 15% of my salary into savings
Hold a Plank for 2 minutes
Practice Swimming
Compete in a Half Ironman
Take a Bartending lesson/class
Run a 7 minute mile
Read 10 Best Sellers ( Yes, Please by Amy Poehler / Not that Kind of Girl by Lena Dunham, The Girl on the Train by Paula Hawkins)
Workout for 30 minutes in the am for 2 weeks (3/13/15)
Finish a 30 day ab challenge -
Read for 30 minutes a day for 1 month
Dye my hair dark red/brown
Don't go to work on my birthday! (3/19/15 - skipped work for a interview, which I nailed!)
Get a Desk for my Apartment

PROFESSIONAL (0/12)
Learn how to do a take off
Learn the basics of scheduling
Redesign my Blog
Have 50 loyal blog followers
Buy a Professional Camera
Find a Mentor
Be featured in an Article
Start Business Planning for my own construction company
Volunteer for 15 hours
Get business cards for my blog
Have my apartment be on The Everygirl
Write for The Everygirl

FAMILY AND FRIENDS (0/15)
Host a Kick Ass Dinner Party where I decorate and cook everything!
Go on a trip with just my two sisters
Send my parents on a vacation
Make a calendar with Birthdays
Compile Addresses (not in my iPhone)
Take a loved one on a surprise vacation and don't tell them where we are going
Send 50 thank you letters - (4 down, 46 to go)
Send  birthday cards
Send 10 snail mail to friends for no reason
Spend a day with each sister doing what they want, paid by me.
Throw a surprise party
Host a blind wine taste testing party
Throw a Scavenger Hunt Party
Host a St. Patrick's Day Party
Take my Dad to Gary Danko

TRAVEL (0/16)
Travel Europe with the Boyfriend
Spend 5 days on a Beach Vacation
Visit Mary in Dallas
Visit Portland
Go back to the Hampton's
Visit Oklahoma
Visit St. Louis
Eat Crabs in Maine
Visit Nantucket
Visit Chicago
Camp for 3 days
Road Trip to the Grand Canyon
Go to Yosemite
Take a snowboarding lesson
Have a Guinness in Ireland
Drink coffee in Seattle (February 14th, 2014)
Visit the Redwoods (drive through that tree)

JUST FOR FUN (0/29)
Give Starbucks $50 to buy people their drinks
Watch the Sunrise
Make a Sushi
Take a Calligraphy Class
Take an Art Class
Master the Yoga Headstand
Learn how to blow glass
Hold a 5 minute conversation in French
Be someones inspiration
Invest in a Burberry Coat
Invest in a timeless watch
Splurge on some killer designer heels
Buy myself a Louis Vuitton/Prada bag or something that is timeless
Stay home and watch all Harry Potter movies on a Rainy Day
Save $25 for each Goal Attained
See a 49-er game
Try SUP Yoga
Learn how to Knit
Buy a strangers meal
Master Crows pose (hold for 15 seconds)
See two movies in one day, sneak into the second one
Create 5 variations of a Moscow Mule and blog about it
Post about my OOTD on my blog
Learn how to do a fish tail braid
Make Ice Cream from Scratch!
Do 5 real push ups
Go to The French Laundry
Go Overboard by decorate my apartment  for Christmas (tree, lights, ornaments, candy canes etc)
Make a snow-man and tie-dye him with food coloring


Happy Halloween

Sunday, November 2, 2014

{Late Halloween Post}

I didn't get into Halloween too much this year, October kind of blew right past me.

Tonight I plan on laying low with close friends and passing out candy. For dinner I am going to attempt to make spicy chicken tortilla soup. I've never made soup before (I am NO domestic goddess), but I'll be sure to document my attempts on the blog.

As it sit here waiting for my ride to the company party, I begin to think about my favorite memories as a kid. While I was in grammar school, we had a school wide parade, ate candy and other sweets in class, and watched movies. I loved dressing up and going to school. It was such a fun way to embrace Halloween and overindulge on sweets. 



A few more traumatizing Halloween memories involves my mother.
Halloween 1996 - Dressed up as Jasmine with Barney and Baby Bop (my sisters).
Halloween 1997 - Spent, no joke, 4 hours trick-or-treating all around Piedmont with my cousins and uncles. I honestly had 10 pounds of candy. My mom picks me up the next mourning at my aunts house and I run outside with my candy bag. She looks at me and says "Leave it".... I just stop in my tracks. "Leave the candy here." She repeats herself. I don't really remember what happened next except that I didn't get to keep the candy and I learned a lifelong lesson. Whenever you have candy, eat it all, and eat it all really fast before you mom takes it away.
Halloween 1998 - My mom is getting a little more cleaver, she creates the "Halloween Fairy". The said Halloween fairy is supposed to magically trade all my candy for a present. That year I got a soccer  ball... because I played soccer. I thought that this was a bunch of BS and I am not doing this again.
Halloween 1999 - My mom, the CPA, decided this is a good time to learn about money and negotiating. This year my mom bought our candy from us. Trading nickles, dimes, and quarters for our good. I was okay with this because I didn't have to sell it all... just most of it.
Halloween 2000 - I wised up. I didn't want to sell my candy this year but I had to. My mom was and is a  fan of almond joys so I up-ed the ante to buy those, knowing she wouldn't want my smarties, reeses or skittles. 
Halloween 2001 - I was going to be a punk rocker or something to that extent but I think I probably lied to my parents so I was grounded and stayed home. womp womp.
Halloween 2002 - I was a legit punk rocker with a short skirt. I looked good. Well judge for yourself.

I probably should have mentioned that sugar turned me into an extremely hyperactive child (I have ADHD and hella proud), and this is why my mother proceeded to torture me.

This year, I am dressing up as a blind mouse, with two others, creating the group costume of 3 blind mice. This is work appropriate and completely thrown together at the last minute. Tonight I might stick with the same costume, or not costume at all. I can't wait to devour some reeses, sour candy and some old school ones too. I do miss the day of trick or treating but am very excited to see the little ones enjoy themselves.

I hope everyone has a fun and safe Halloween! 

p.s. Drinking game-  Take a shot/sip etc for ever Frozen costume you see!